Hi Folks,
Being Monday I am in a bad mood and depressed about existence, questioning the meaning of life 🤣. Don’t worry it gets better by Wednesday and all cured by Friday. I have worked in IT for many years and vacations have always been an interesting intellectual study of the managerial species. I think it soon started after the year 2000. Y2K did not blow up the world so Managers everywhere decided that their many sins had gone unpunished. I can’t remember the first Manager who tried the “we are all just like family line” with me. Right away I knew that there was some horrible task that he wanted me to do during my vacation but did not want to pay more for it. He must have figured that a computer nerd social loser like myself had no friends and that my family were very happy that I was thousands of miles away. This was though back in the days before Twitter boss type sycophant behaviour and “worship the boss for points” game, so I calmly answered that we could not be family genetically given the fact that he was so much uglier than me 😀.” I said it jokingly and I will give him this much he had a sense of humour and to be fair never again tried the “let’s get this idiot to do more for less” trick with me again.
It was when I got back to North America I realised that there was a massive pandemic of this stuff going on. Suddenly at almost every job I had I was now “family, a brother, a friend, and everything imaginable” Fighting off the temptation of thinking that I was actually loved all of the sudden I stuck to my scepticism by listing all of my imperfections and reasons not to be liked. That helped.
The easiest vaccine for this brainwashing was to realise that these messages of devotion were always related to “be available for your family during vacation” type of thing and were conveniently forgotten at bonus, pay raise time, when the family shrunk to only top level executives and it was back to sleeping on the factory floor as one great Twit from twitter once stated.
Then I believe it was circa 2010 when the Teamish virus arrived on the scene. I am not talking about that horrid app by Microsoft, instead I mean the “we are all a team” philosophy/propaganda. Don’t get me wrong I have played on many teams during my life and lost a few teeth “for the team” in games like ice hockey but I have to admit never on any of those teams were there characters running around chanting “for the team, for the team” like I have seen in the IT world (while the manager lets out an evil grin).
Soon slogans and quick confirmation statements of loyalty started popping up everywhere in meetings and even HR funded events. Blurry eyed fanatics wandering around chanting “there is no I in Teams!!” “I love my Team, I don’t exist but only for my Team” It got to the point that if you did not let out at least one “team” word, with a positive connotation of course, you were suspect. I am certain that many a time did denunciations reach HR “I don’t think Burke is particularly enthusiastic about the team on evenings, weekends or during vacation time”.
How many HR fire side chats did I have to endure when I let my humour get the best of me. There was that time that I heard during meeting for the umpteenth time “There is no I in Teams” to which I jokingly replied “but there is in Idiot”.
Or when I was scolded for stating that if we are all a team and all family then lets all be on call and all share equal salaries including the CEO? I was quickly reminded of the food chain and told that a Team always needs a captain, a parent figure (back to the family thing again) to help us stay clear of our mistakes
That is why I began choosing vacation locations near polar bears and in other remote locations with no connectivity. I am all for family and the team but if there is no connectivity alas…
At some point I am sure I will end up doing space exploration once the net completely covers the earth.
Do you folks get away from it all on Vacation? or are you tied to the team? :)
